My Story

Let me paint a picture for you: it was January 2005, I was a junior in high school and it was the Saturday night of my Confirmation retreat. We're sitting in a small chapel with dimmed lights, candles on the altar lit up the monstrance, Amazing Love was playing in the background. I still remember it like it was yesterday - the moment I really heard the Gospel and responded. I remember thinking, "could this be true? Could God really love me like that? Could He really know my heart and still desire me?" And when the truth convicted me, my response was instant: "Jesus, if you offered Yourself on the cross for me, then I will offer myself fully, radically in return. From now on, I am yours."

That became a defining moment in my life: an invitation to a life of joy, pursuit, love, and purpose. Of course, I couldn't verbalize any of this at the time and I had never even heard the term “consecrated virgin.” I just knew that I had found the “pearl of great price” and He was worth sacrificing everything for. That is the beauty of the spiritual life: it’s a lifelong pursuit and a slow revelation. It was when I was in college studying early church history that I first discovered the ancient consecrated virgins. These women offered their lives fully to Christ by foregoing marriage and instead dedicated themselves to prayer, service, and the work of the Church. They often suffered great persecution for their vocation: many were even martyred. I was captivated and discovered a growing desire to imitate them.

As I began formally pursuing this vocation, I was full of doubt and fear. So I looked for reasons not to continue; and I found them. I was too young, I lacked consistency in my prayer, and I was afraid of rejection. So I closed that door and didn’t open it again until 6 years ago when a friend prophetically spoke about my vocation. I tried to brush it off but that little voice would not go away. After a few weeks of resistance, I was ready to listen. Since then, it seems to me that Jesus has taken me one small step at a time: pursuing me, teaching me, and guiding me to the altar.

Since I began formation, one question I’ve received a lot is this: So, why do I want to be consecrated, to be a bride of Christ? Simply put: because Jesus is asking me to. Because “I have found the one my soul loves,” and nothing else will satisfy. Here’s a few other things I love about this vocation:

My life is radically available to the Holy Spirit. I have the time and flexibility to “be about the Bridegroom’s business,” to serve, teach, and pray in ways many people cannot.
I want heaven now. A consecrated virgin points to the life we will live in heaven, when we are at the heavenly wedding banquet, perfectly united with one another and with Christ.
Consecrated virginity is arguably the most ancient religious vocation in the church. It dates back to Mary herself, and was imitated by many young woman in the early church.
Consecrated virgins do not take vows, instead we are consecrated by God Himself, through the hands of the bishop. Vows end at death but consecration is permanent, beyond death. Which makes consecrated virginity one of the most permanent vocations in the Church: my state of life won’t change once I’m in heaven.